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Writer's pictureCaroline Matthews

It’s kind of ironic…that the ‘best boob years’ were squandered in underwire & self-consciousness

Updated: Jun 16, 2023



You know that expression ‘beauty is wasted on the young?!’


Well, I’d be inclined to go a step further… and say that perky boobs are wasted on the young!


I’m speaking from personal experience when I say this (and with a tongue firmly in cheek) as it seems like such a waste now, that my twenty-year-old self would REFUSE to wear anything backless, for fear of the great taboo that was…bralessness!


At this tender age, when there was surely nothing more shock-horror than the prospect of ‘sweater bullets’ on a night out, the Wonderbra stood as much chance as being surrendered as that now-cringe diamanté ‘going out’ belt!!


It’s kind of ironic, really, looking back on it…that the ‘best boob years’ were squandered away in underwire, padding and self-consciousness, while the realisation that nobody really cares about a nip-slip anyway, arrived two breastfed babies too late!


In a case of if you know, you know…it’s a question of what my backless-dress loving, 39-year-old self wouldn’t give now, to be able to pass that all-telling ‘pencil test’ without mastering a slight lean!


Though seemingly a serious question, know that this one isn’t rooted in ANY desire to re-wind the years. Quite the opposite, in fact, as beneath the deflated-balloon banter, there’s this overriding realisation…


That what the years might take away in ‘puppy perkiness’, they add back ten fold in #wgaf… something that is a much greater determinant for being able to pull off a backless number, than having an inability to stash stationary on your person!



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